Bang.

I think you’ve been taking too long. No, nothing is wrong with me today.
I just like my life when its fast, from a to b. 16 to z.
Plus I just sat three hours in some music festival for you and, well.
You still wanna wait in line for one more 60 seconds to get autographs from commons.
Autographs you get from superheroes n shit. People who save babies from trees.
Not the fuckers who asked how that baby got there, none of your business.
Now pay no mind to my impatience (its just a side effect from too much coffee, and not enough cigarette)
And I can still taste that dinner we had that I forgot to pay for. We jetted so quickly my dear, oh the modern romance.
But I wont get in the way of your important business that I simply will never understand.
Had I only been patient and had I only sat through those four years, id know accounting.
Simply had to choose art, didn’t i?

So now we sit here looking at eachothers faces in the space shuttle car with its little trinkets and air conditioner, automatic shifting. A lot of crap in the back makes it a little harder to take it past making out tonight. But I think neither of us is ready for such a strange adventure into each others genitals. You look beyond me wishing we could escape to somewhere really nice. And I look at the individual rain drops on the window counting them to see how many on average sit there when it rains. We don’t have the courage to stay in the car because we hate going home. So its doors open and doors locked to walk another two blocks into whatever is out there. I think maybe a gift shop, or a thrift store, perhaps a cool trinket store. You think a sex shop (for laughs), some guy can jump out and stab me in the stomach to leave me there watching you get sexually violated, or pigs could be stubborn on us. Its always negative meets the positive around this skyscraper sorrounded piece of earth. And all I want is an apartment, with a nice stainless steal kitchen I always see in the nice shows I watch. And that full prismacolor marker set I always dreamt of.
My girl wants rebellion while I want a cup of joe and a pack of smokes.
Strange how we’ve always been the same way since kids, only at some point the toys changed classification and placement in a store.
If only I could raise the courage to perform “dancing in the rain” a little more, I just might be a cool cat.
Too lazy though.
Too fuckin lazy.
While everyone seems to tell me I need to find a place in life I sit on my bed watching the ceiling change shapes and colors and streaming through my mind I find nice things like cereal and charlie & the chocolate factory. Its been a long time since ive painted anything so bizzare. Its been a while since ive had sex too. But that’s a plus most of the time, I don’t like being like everyone else anyways. The f-1 gp is gonna be happening soon. And im still a little seasick. So let us all retire to our beds and forget all that happens in one day to say you never did it before the next. Its how we think, and react to shit that’s meaningless in reality. You want the world to turn, do it yourself. All I know is I wanna go to a foreign country, eat their chocolate, kiss their most beautiful hopeless girls. Not fuck, that word connects to something very meaningless and not anywhere near my style of being. I like it a little simple. Plus im tired of going to three hour shows with girls I sometimes wonder if I even remember a name from. But that’s life, no? And everyday prooves walking a little swifter when thinking exactly how many “bang bang”s you need to die these days. But I always end up slowing down when I see those dream girls crawling in a corner with theyre faces covered in tears, I wish I could cheer them up. But I feel that’s pointless in my position as stranger. Although they do look amazing in those colorful outfits and converse. On my way close to home I see a prostitute hanging over a car acting actually very friendly, it was a strange view that became stranger when I noticed the car had an evangelical sticker on the back. She had a cliché skirt, made me think about a million funny movies that most of which I never even saw. I bet she smelled like post opened fanta cans and weeks unwashed crotch. But its not my style to stop and ask to sniff. So I just head home as always.
Getting home deserves a small dance against the rain of tomorrow so the beach may be accessible. I don’t need to plant anything, so I don’t need rain. Its nice to watch the city late through the window. The lights, the couples, the creepers that smell like dirt and ask for money and sleep on the streets. Or I can go to the other window and watch the beach, maybe grab binoculars and get myself over 100 channels through apartments. But im always too lacking in motivation to find the binoculars in the first place, so I do little duets with the canary sitting in the kitchen. Sometimes it would be really nice if I could just free that little dude, he probably came here through a truck. Meaning hes probably never seen the beach. That must suck. Im still not getting sleepy because sleep is something I rarely ever do. Theres so much to do in the inevitable situation that I sometimes forget where I am. But I leave traces.

Nights.

My bodies shaking, Please take me to the nearest anywhere outside of this house. Just tell me I'm not wasting your time. Just tell me you love me if I'm not. We can get away from this place, I'm just tired of sitting here. Every one has fun but me, and i just don't think I'm ready for this kind of commitment to the modern world. I'll have fun in my own way. Just please let's get out of here. I'll show you the world and beyond, I'll show you the time of your life in less than a few hours. I promise to be the best thing that's happened in your life if you promise to be the best in mine. Just tell me everything will be fine and tell me the world is turning without dragging me by the neck. The time is 1:30 and i don't understand why I'm still lingering around here. But i can't help to sit here and watch you go along with them while i dream about the things we could be doing, and the world we could be getting away from. I'm too young to die this way. My friends bore me, and so does the life they hand me. And the life i hand myself. Every Friday night, nothing happens. The awkward car rides with the fake laughter that fills up in my lungs. The tapping of my foot to the music i wish i was listening to instead of hearing these people bicker about the stupidest things. I just want to be with you, Oh why did i come here? And why are these thoughts running through my head?


Take it slow, We can forget about the folks at home, they're too old to understand the liberalism of the young. But if our worlds don't coalesce with each other, then promise to never slow me down. Because i drag enough as it is and i don't need to see another pretty face on the ground. I try to get away but all i can say is that i need you today. We can take my jeep, and we can clap to our songs, and we can do anything. I promise not to control, and i promise the world to you. Just promise to me you'll end my days of sleeping by myself. This boredom kills me. Why can't a person dream? And why are we killing our selfs with these words of wisdom when i just wanna be young while this lasts? I remember having years of life left in my body. Just lemme finish this cigarette and we can hop in the cab and we can go away for a night. I don't wanna be by myself watching these city lights flashing through the raindrop covered windows. And i don't wanna spend another night wondering what could have been and what i should have done, i just want to be with you.

Let me forget the band for just one night, let me find myself for just one day. I'm under control, and i just wanna let go. The record deals and the Hollywood feel just makes me wanna steal back my loving soul. We were so young, and we had so much hope. But now we don't have anything. And i can just sit here playing my tunes, and singing my songs. But there's no point in any of this when I'm without you. There's no point in the money. There's no point in this musical flurry that has hit my mind. And i just wanna live like i used to. We can grab the 40's and I'll drop by the 7/11 to get a pack of cigarettes and some McDonald's will be our breakfast at the end of this hungover night. Just promise me that you'll be by my side when the end of my sleep arrives. Because it's been years since i found a pair of lips to kiss and I'm getting so tired of this happening. Let's stay by each others sides. You can carry the shield and I'll swing the sword. And we can sneak into movie theaters just to play the video games at the arcade. Maybe we won't get kicked out. Remind me of why i fight for love for just one night. Because i can't remember anymore.

We can walk by the streets and be the bad ass kids we've always been told not to be. We can kick over pieces of paper and shoot people in the back with our fingers. We can lie down on a hill where the sky is nice and the wind is still free. And you can smile and i can smile and we can kiss. Just remind me that we're still a couple of kids. Tell me that sadness and fear were just dreams and i spent these years asleep. Because that's all i wanna hear right now. Tell me i already got on the plane and came back. I just can't stand knowing the best year of my life has the worst end surrounded by tears. And all these Friday nights were spent in lonely solitude. Now i find those who complete me and the end is near? But not tonight, no i don't want to remember tonight as the last night. Just tell me every things alright. Because i don't know what else to do with my future. Much less what I've done in my past. Remind me that I'm in the present, and tell me for the love of god i still have my life ahead of me. Because it feels like it's already done. I want to be revived right now, I want to stand up and break through this steel door that suddenly decided to show up in my face. Let's go crazy and shoot at the world with candy cannons. Because i don't want to remember what war is. And i just want to know that there's love left in this world. Remind me of this night. And we'll forget our frights.

Co-co crisps.

Vamos, Né?
Se foce para recordar todas as mortes só no Jornal Nacional e no Fantastico, Putz!
Aonde vamos hoje. Aonde tem lugar pra durmir cheirando o mar meu irmão. Não tem necessidade de luz do sol quando tem a luz da lua, Né? Mas não tem romantico igual o romantico de plantão. E não garota igual a garota que tu olha quinem idiota no andar devolta pra casa as 6 da manha meu filho. Sono não existe quando o pensamento ta cheio de memorias que nem existem. Só existe barulho de guitarra nas veias, e show pa caralho pra enlouquecer.
A verdade é pura, Tu nunca vai falar com a garota que tu olha no andar pra casa.
E tu nunca vai ter dinhero pra ver o Interpol.

Então. Vamos?
Larga tua felicidade no bolso, e vamos.
Cara durmindo na rua? Isso é Brasil meu filho. Igual a esse não existe. Don´t get knocked up, it'll make everything obscure! Fogo,Cigarro,Guitarra,Voz. Então. Esconde tua felicidade dentro da bolsa, e vamos largar déssa negatividade, Pra onde vamos, Não tem espaço pra éssa porra.


Tem nada pra fazer, Vamos sentar na sala e assistir filmes velhos com pipoca e guarana. Porra.

Fuck!

And this is it.FUCK writing.Fuck listening.Fuck drawing.Fuck white men in blue suits. Fuck black men in red shirts. Fuck every ethnicity in between.Fuck getting used to this shit. Fuck moving on. Fuck you're opinion. Fuck what i think. Fuck her. Fuck him. Fuck the fucking life we live. Fuck the death we'll fucking go through.Fuck the laws of gravity. Fuck floating.Fuck getting a job. Fuck staying job-less. Fuck you. Fuck me.FUCK love. Fuck staying single. Fuck experiencing life. Fuck staying blind.Fuck ex girlfriends who leave you for addiction. Fuck alcoholics. Fuck drug addicts. Fuck being sober. Fuck being fucked up.Fuck straight-edge. Fuck puritans. Fuck fat fuckers who take the bitch you love.Fuck the bitch you love. Fuck having felt love. Fuck having never felt love.Fuck being angry. Fuck being calm. Fuck stress. Fuck peace. Fuck this fucking constant contradiction. Fuck making sense.Fuck being placed inside the problem. Fuck staying out of it.Fuck being understood. Fuck being misunderstood. Fuck loving. FUCK best friends. Fuck no friends. Fuck people in general. Fuck the world. Fuck the solar system. Fuck the universe. Fuck the black hole. And fuck the motherfucker who fucking said pluto isnt a fucking planet anymore. That fuck. FUCK music. Fuck being taste-less. Fuck fashion. Fuck being taste-less even more. Fuck art. Fuck having no mind. Fuck having A mind. Fuck teenagers. Fuck teenagers ways. Fuck denial. Fuck knowing whats going on. Fuck facing your fears. Fuck running away from them. FUCK teabagging. Fuck sex. Fuck doggystyle. Fuck 69. Fuck your girlfriend. Fuck your boyfriend. Fuck your kids. Fuck your kids friends. Fuck their parents. Fuck yourself.Fuck having something to say. Fuck having nothing to say. For the second fucking time? Fuck all these fucking contradiction. Fuck everyone saying the same shit. Fuck songs that sound like this fucking shit im writing. Fuck the people who wrote those songs. They're fucking idiots. FUCK stupid kids. Fuck ignorant pigs. Fuck tits. Fuck chicks. Fuck dicks. Fuck pricks. Fuck gifts. Fuck lifts. Fuck rhyming. Its a fucking waste of my fucking time. FUCK TIME. Fuck waiting. Fuck going. Fuck going for it while waiting. Fuck sense. Fuck senselessness. Fuck the word Fuck. Fuck knowing you can use this shitty word so many times. Fuck variations of this word. Fuck verbs. Fuck dictionaries. Fuck all this. Fuck stopping. Fuck going. Fuck stopping to go. Fuck stop and shop.FUCK corporations. Fuck activists. Fuck peace. Fuck war. Fuck for peace while your fucking genitals are at war. Fuck presidents. Fuck vice-presidents. Fuck tragedy. Fuck happyness. Fuck dance music. Fuck kids taking e. Fuck bouncers. Fuck legal ages. Fuck you trying to fucking say you completely understand when i say "fuck legal ages" You're a fucking ignorant little shit and you dont fucking know any shit. Much less the fucking shit that i say. So fuck you. FUCK corporate mascots. Fuck tony the tiger. Fuck naming fucking tigers. Fuck Ronald McFUCKINGdonald. Fuck clowns that are happy. Fuck clowns that are sad. Fuck the three little white kids from the rice krispies shit.Fuck cigarettes. Fuck addiction. And for the second time? Fuck being a puritan. FUCK religion. Fuck giving god head. Fuck buddy jesus. Fuck the devil. Fuck lucifer. Fuck being poked by a trident. Fuck mount olympus. Fuck humanity believing in this shit. FUCK humanity in general. Im fucking done. Fuck you trying to stop me. Fuck you telling me to go on. I'll go on when i fucking want to. Fuck you. Fuck me. Fuck saying the word FUCK so many times.